


The Mortician's Daughter

by thatscalledyes



Series: Carolyn/Andy [1]
Category: Black Veil Brides
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-07-06
Updated: 2013-07-06
Packaged: 2017-12-17 21:55:25
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Underage
Chapters: 22
Words: 18,811
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/872370
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thatscalledyes/pseuds/thatscalledyes
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Carolyn was always an odd ball. Being the <strong>Mortician's Daughter</strong> doesn't get you a lot of friends. When a member of her favorite band unexpectedly 'drops' by at her house, she does all she can to make him her only friend.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Carolyn

She had been too young to remember her mother’s murder but that doesn’t mean she didn’t hear stories about it or read about it in the newspaper clippings that her father had stashed away in the attic.

When Carolyn was three years old, her mother had been brutally murdered by a man who got away. The man had never been identified. To this day, almost fourteen years later, Carolyn has secretly been in search of the man who murdered her mother.

She never told anyone about it. She didn’t really have any friends. And if they knew, they would start to make up rumors about it. They would say she had murdered her mother or her father had done it or they did it together. All the kids at school would start making Lizzie Borden jokes and start calling her that in the hallways. That was one thing she didn’t need in her life. When she was in elementary school, she had told all her friends about how her father worked with dead people. At the age of 6 years old, she didn’t understand what her dad _really_ did but it sounded cool. All the kids at school thought so, too. She had a lot of friends growing up because all the kids were interested in what her dad did as a job.

“Do the people come back as zombies?!” Some of the boys would ask.

When they got to high school, everything changed. All her so-called “friends” had found out what a mortician _really_ did and they thought it was weird. They all made fun of her for being different. She was different, but she didn’t think she was that different because of what her dad did as a job. The kids at school obviously thought otherwise.

It didn’t help her situation when they all found out where she lived. Carolyn lived with her father on the outskirts of town. Only the outcasts lived on the outskirts of town. They lived together in an old, small, black cottage with a cemetery behind the house dating back to the early 1700s. Carolyn thought it was cool but obviously the other kids at school didn’t.

They ridiculed her every day. They called her names: freak, loser, queer, outcast, emo, anything you could think up. But she was shy, and didn’t say anything to anyone. She just let them call her names and laugh at her every day. And then every day after school, she would walk across the brown, dying grass to her front door. Her father was usually never home when she got home from school. She would tread quietly up the creaky old staircase to her small room at the end of the hall.

Her home was the only place she felt safe. She even felt safe in the cemetery behind the house. She never wanted to leave. Every time she left her house, she was ridiculed. It didn’t matter where she went. Someone was always making fun of her. She was beautiful, but beauty didn’t matter if you weren’t popular. If you were a nobody, no one cared.

Carolyn always thought that this is how things would be for the rest of her life. She couldn’t go anywhere without someone making a stupid comment about her father’s job or how she was a freak. Nothing could have prepared her for what was about to come next.


	2. You're such a freak

Hell is what she liked to call it. Of course, it wasn’t hell, but it was pretty close to it in her eyes. It was just another place for her to be made fun of: her dance studio.

Carolyn loved to dance. It made her feel like she was in another world far away from the one she lived in. She could be in a room with a hundred people but if she was dancing, she felt like she was the only one in the room. She could zone everyone out and be free for once in her life. She didn’t have to have any worries, or a care in the world. Nobody could touch her. She was flying.

Dance class always had to end at some point, though. And she would come crashing down to earth like a fallen angel. Dance class always had to start, too. Those two moments in time, before and after, were the two times she hated most about going to class every week.

She opened the door and threw it closed behind her, making it slam shut. She couldn’t hear anything because of the loud music pulsating through her headphones, but she knew that at least one of those prissy little bitches had screamed.

She found great joy in scaring them. They all thought she was a freak anyway. Why not play along a little? Why not get some satisfaction out of it herself?

She walked past the short hallway that led to the small room at the end where all the girls stored their bags and gathered before class. Carolyn wasn’t invited to join them. That room was for the girls on the competition team only and Carolyn couldn’t afford that. Even if she was in the company with the rest of the girls, she knew she wouldn’t be invited to hang out with them. They all thought, as said before, that she was a freak. But really, she was just a little misunderstood.

She sat down in a wooden chair in the corner by herself and placed her bag down on the floor by her feet. She hit pause on her iPod and turned the power off before wrapping the black cord tightly around the width of the device and placing it in the inside pocket of her bag.

She could hear all the girls laughing from down the hall and talking about who knows what; probably her, no doubt.

She rummaged through her bag and pulled out her worn out pointe shoes. Hers were different than the other girls. They all had nice brand new ones. Hers had holes on the toes. The other girls had pink. Hers were dyed black.

Her teacher had never said anything to her; only once. All her teacher had said was to make sure she had pink shoes for their annual recital. Other than that, she didn’t care what color her shoes were for rehearsals.

As she laced up her shoes, she watched the other girls parade out of the room and up the stairs to the big room with the tall mirrors.

She tied her second shoe lace into a little bow before hurrying behind the other girls up to the room.

Again, she stood alone in the corner and waited for class to start. All the girls gathered into small groups and talked with one another but just left Carolyn over in the corner by herself. No one cared. None of them wanted to talk to her or even have anything to do with her. Not even her best friend Amber.

Amber was another one of those “friends” that had ditched her when she found out what her dad really did as a job. Carolyn and Amber used to have such good times together. They used to have sleepovers every weekend—always at Ambers house because Carolyn was too embarrassed to have friends over at her house—and they shared inside jokes, laughed together, and were the best of friends. Now, they were complete strangers.

After class had ended, it was time for another ride to hell. Carolyn sulked down the stairs to her bag and unlaced her shoes. She slid her worn out converse on and pulled on her jacket before swinging her bag over her shoulder and going outside to wait for her father to pick her up in the hearse. It was the only car they owned and Carolyn was so embarrassed to be seen getting picked up in it. She wanted a car of her own, but she had no money and neither did her father. He had just enough to pay for dance classes and get by on bills and taxes.

A few girls waltzed out to their cars or the rides that were waiting for them. A couple others stayed behind inside to avoid being near Carolyn. But today, two brave souls decided to wait outside with her.

She barely heard them whispering things to each other and snuck a glance over at them.

“You do it.” One girl nudged the other.

“No, you say it.” The other girl insisted.

“Oh, fine. I’ll do it. But it’s your turn next week.” The first girl said.

The girl skipped over to Carolyn, her blonde ponytail swinging behind her.

Another thing Carolyn hated about them. They always had too much pep. They were always so bubbly as if nothing bad could ever happen to them.

“Hi Carolyn.” The girl said.

Carolyn looked over at her briefly but said nothing and turned her head to look straight ahead at the wilting trees in front of her.

The girl glanced back at her friend who shrugged and gave her a ‘keep going’ gesture. The girl looked back over at Carolyn and tapped her on the shoulder.

Carolyn didn’t look at her but simply stated “What.”

“Well. I was going to say you did a great job in class today.” The girl said. “But with that attitude, I wont.”

“Well, you just did say it, so thanks anyway.” Carolyn said.

“Why are you such a freak, Carolyn? Honestly. Why can’t you just be normal like the rest of us? You know, if you didn’t act like you hated the world, we might actually try and be friends with you.” The girl said.

“And why are you such a bitch, Kali?” Carolyn shot back. “I’m never going to be normal. This is who I am. It’s not an act, either. I do hate the world. The world is an ugly place filled with ugly people like you.”

Kali gasped and ran back to her friend. “Freak!” She called back to her. “What the hell goes through your mind, Carolyn? You need help.”

Carolyn turned her head slowly to face Kali. “You don’t want to know what goes through my mind, Kali. My mind is a dark place and you wouldn’t last one second there.”

Her father pulled up in the hearse and she jumped in. She was so glad to just get away from Kali, Amber and all the other girls. Finally, she could go home to the one place she really belonged: the cemetery.


	3. A familiar face

“How was it?” Her dad asked, trying to sound positive.

He knew what Carolyn’s answer would be, though. It was always the same answer every week but her dad would always ask in the hopes of a different answer.

“Class itself was fine. I had a lot of fun. After class was not so fun.” She replied, pressing her forehead against the cool glass window.

“Now what happened?” He pulled up to a red light and looked over at his daughter.

“Kali called me a freak again…” She mumbled.

The light turned green, and her father accelerated slowly through the intersection. “Do I need to have a talk with Kali’s mother?”

“God no. Dad, that’s the last thing I want. Just… leave it be. I’m used to it by now…” Carolyn slumped down in her seat.

“Is there anything I can do to help you? I know I don’t know much about teenage girls but I can learn if I need to. They have books on that type of stuff, right?” Carolyn’s dad was always trying to play both parenting roles. He was constantly trying to be Carolyn’s mother and father at the same time and frankly, it was not working. She could see he was trying his best to do everything he could to help her, but she didn’t want any help. She knew that none of the teasing or name calling would go away, so why bother putting all that effort into something that was never going to change?

As soon as her father pulled up into the driveway, Carolyn jumped out. She didn’t even wait for him to stop the car. She just opened her door and stepped out of the car. She couldn’t wait to be in her room.

Carolyn ran up the cobblestone path way to the front door and pushed her way inside. She ran up the stairs and down the dark, skinny hallway to the lonely room at the end; her room.

If Carolyn’s room could be described in one word, it would be black. All four walls were painted an onyx black color with white writing scribbled on the walls; song lyrics. She had painted them on herself and looked to them for guidance. When she was lonely, she would read them over and quietly sing each song to herself. The words on the wall kept her going. They were her motivation to live each day.

Sitting on the desk in the corner were her two only friends.

Friend One: the red notebook. Carolyn loved to write. Writing in her life was the equivalent of dancing. It was something that allowed her to explore her own mind and create a world where she could go to and control everything. She wrote mostly song lyrics because she was so heavily influenced by her music.

Friend Two: the razor. Carolyn was a cutter. She thought it was a nasty habit of hers, but she couldn’t stop. It had started when she was only ten years old. She was down in the morgue and her father had told her to stay put and not touch anything. He had to go grab something from the house. The morgue was a two minute walking distance from their house. But Carolyn was curious—as any ten year old would be. She walked around the dead body lying on the table and looked at all her father’s tools. They appeared to be very sharp and she knew not to touch them. There had been some formaldehyde on the floor and she slipped and fell onto the tray of sharp instruments. The scalpel dug into her skin and tore a long cut all the way down her arm. She didn’t scream. She didn’t cry. The pain actually felt relieving. From that point on, she cut almost every day and couldn’t stop herself.

Now that she was older, she would draw a dotted line across her wrists and label each one. One line for every name she was called that day, one line for the loss of her mother, one line for the stress of school and one line just because.

Right now wasn’t the time to cut, though. That would be for later that night when her father was asleep and there was no one around to walk in on her. Right now, it was time for her to practice. Although she had just gotten home from dance, the cemetery called to her.

She dropped her dance bag on her bed and pulled out her black slippers. She laced up the ballet shoes and tread lightly down the creaky stairs to sneak out to the cemetery.

She liked the cemetery. It was an open space big enough for her to practice in. The head stones actually helped her. They were like guide lines for how high her leg should be in her arabesque.

When she got tired, she would walk around and sit with the deceased. Death didn’t scare her. She always dreamed of what the after life was like. She would kneel at each of the graves and talk with every dead person lying six feet under the cold, dead earth. It made her feel like she had friends—although these friends couldn’t talk back.

The dead understood her. They were there to listen to her. She told them her problems and about what had happened at school that day.

Today, a fog had begun to settle over the decrepit cemetery. She stood and began to walk around, taking in the eerie scene in front of her.

Her foot hit something and she tripped, regaining her balance quickly. She couldn’t see the ground in front of her. Too much fog had settled. She assumed it was a rock sticking up from the ground or a baby headstone that she never knew was there before.

She knelt down to see if she could find out what it was she had tripped on. She swatted the fog away with her hand and saw a tangled mass of black hair. Maybe it was an animal of some sort? She didn’t want to touch it if that was the case but she swiped away more fog and saw that the mass of black hair had a human body attached to it.

She rolled the body over onto its back so the person was facing upwards. She brushed the black hair out of the way and revealed a boy’s pale face—eyes closed. Blood traveled down the side of his head to his lips and down his chin. The blood had already begun to dry which meant this poor boy had been just laying here for a while. For all she knew, he could be dead. As she studied the boys face a little more, she realized that this wasn’t just an ordinary boy.

This was Andy Biersack—her idol.


	4. Don't die

What was she supposed to do now? Here was Andy Biersack just laying in a bloody mess on her property. She didn’t even know if he was alive or not. She could safely say that she was genuinely scared for the first time in her life.

She held her long, blonde hair back as she leaned her head down to his chest. She could hear the faint sound of his heart beat but it was slow. He was dying. If she didn’t get help soon, he would die for sure.

She needed time, but time wasn’t on her side. The longer she sat there and tried to figure out what to do, the sooner he would be dead. She looked to the black house behind her. If she ran fast enough, she could probably make it to her father in time.

She looked back at Andy who appeared to be slowly waking up. Well, at least he wasn’t dead… yet. He opened his gorgeous blue eyes and looked up at her, his face contorted into a look of confusion. He reached up and held his head with both hands.

“My head…” He groaned.

“Don’t move.” Carolyn warned. “You’ve had excessive hemorrhage to the skull.”

When your father is a mortician, you tend to pick up on phrases like hemorrhage and other medical terms.

Andy looked at her. “Hemorrhage?” He asked.

“Bleeding.” She clarified. “Just lie down and close your eyes. I’m going to get help. Whatever you do, do not move your head. And don’t die. I’ll be right back.”

He nodded and she frowned at him. “What did I just say about moving your head?” She scolded.

“Oh, right. Sorry…” He apologized and closed his eyes again.

The pain was overwhelming. He wanted the pounding to stop. It was like a massive migraine. He felt like he had two brains stuffed into his one small skull. The amount of pressure was intense.

When she thought he was okay, she stood up and ran back to her house to find her father. She burst through the back door and began calling out to her father. “Dad!” She cried. “Dad! Where are you?!”

No response.

She smacked her palm against her forehead. He was down in the morgue… Even though the morgue was just by her house, she was afraid to leave Andy in the cemetery by himself. But he was too heavy for her to carry in the house and she wouldn’t know what to do if she touched his head and it started bleeding again.

She had to make a decision and quick. It was literally a matter of life and death right now. She decided that the best way to save Andy’s life would be to get her dad. He could easily stitch up the gash in Andy’s head and give him extra blood if he needed it.

She ran as fast as she possibly could all the way to the morgue. She thought her legs where going to fall off by the time she finally reached her dad. She could see the morgue in sight but she was quickly running out of breath. She pushed herself to keep going for the last few yards and stumbled down the concrete stairs to the morgue.

“Dad…” She said, breathlessly. “You need… to come… quick…”

“Carolyn? What’s going on?” Carolyn never interrupted him while he was working. He figured something must’ve happened. “Is it an emergency? I’m with a patient.”

“Dad… The person isn’t even alive.” Her breathing had finally caught up with the rest of her. “Please, I need you. This is really important. My… my friend, he’s… he’s dying. Please…”

“Your friend?” He was surprised at the word ‘friend’. He didn’t think Carolyn had any friends, let alone a friend that was a boy. He looked into the girls pleading eyes and sighed, putting his scalpel down on the stainless steel tray. “Okay, where is he?”

Carolyn smiled with relief. “Grab your thread and needles. He’s going to need some stitches.”

Carolyn’s father grabbed the few items he needed before following his daughter up the stairs. As soon as Carolyn reached the top of the stairs, she began running again.

“Carolyn! Wait up!” Her father called after her.

“Dad, this can’t wait! Hurry up!” She called back to him without stopping.

The mortician sighed, shaking his head, and began to jog after his daughter. He followed her to the cemetery in the back of the house where Andy was laying.

“Over here!” She called out to him, waving him over.

The mortician knelt by the boy and examined the deep slice across his temple. “It seems he was hit over the head by something.” The mortician observed and plucked something from the deep wound. “Glass.” He determined, pulling the bloody shard of glass from Andy’s head. “We need to get him inside. I need your help. Put one of his arms over your shoulder and grab under his knees. On three, we’ll pick him up and carry him to the house, okay?”

Carolyn nodded, hooking Andy’s right arm around her neck and placing her hand beneath his right knee. Her father did the same on the other side and counted “One, two, three.”

Together, they lifted him up and carried him inside. The whole way into the house, Carolyn prayed that Andy would wake up soon. If her dad couldn’t save him, she was going to need a miracle. This couldn’t be happening; not to the one person she looked up to the most in her entire life.


	5. Flashback

Andy was out cold. He tried to look for something or someone. He searched for the girl with the beautiful blue eyes and blonde hair. He looked for a light of any sort. If he was dead, he wanted his soul to at least be at peace. He didn’t want to spend the rest of his after life on earth.

I know what you’re thinking. Is he dead? The answer: no. Is he close to it? Absolutely.

Just as he was about to give up his search for some type of a sign, there was a flash of white light and he began to see the events of the night before play in his mind as if he were watching the memory on a movie screen.

It was late and the boys had just played an awesome show. To celebrate, they all decided to go out somewhere. Andy really just wanted to go back to the bus, but all the guys insisted he come with them.

“It won’t be the same if you don’t come.” CC whined.

“Yeah,” Ashley agreed. “Please, Andy?” He pouted.

Andy sighed. “Okay, okay, fine. Peer pressure wins again…”

The boys cheered and dragged Andy into the nearest bar.

Andy wasn’t a big drinker. He liked it, but preferred his cigarettes more, that’s for sure. After about an hour of drinking, Andy was legally drunk. He couldn’t see straight ahead of him, his vision was blurred and he saw two of everything.

He decided to go outside for a smoke. None of the other guys really smoked so he went alone. He leaned back against the brick wall and lit up the cancer stick lingering between his lips. He took a long drag and blew the smoke out in front of his face.

He heard the door to the bar open and saw his band mates walk—well, more like stumble—out of the bar. Andy pushed off the wall and went to go follow them. He figured they must be going back to the bus to sleep off their drunken state.

He wasn’t too far behind them when they passed by an alleyway and someone grabbed Andy from behind, pulling him into the alley and away from his friends. The rest of the guys were too drunk to notice he was gone.

Andy tried to scream but a man’s fat hand was shoved over his mouth, muffling his cries for help. To get the stupid kid in his arms to shut up, the man picked up a discarded beer bottle on the grimy alleyway ground and bashed the bottle over the kid’s head, sending shards of glass flying everywhere and digging one into the side of the guy’s head.

Andy’s whole body went limp at the blow and the man was relieved he had stopped trying to scream. Now all he had to do was to get rid of the body. But where? He didn’t want to just leave the kid stranded in the alley. Someone would definitely find him here. The murderer didn’t want the boy’s body to be found. He didn’t want to get caught. He had been on the run from the police for the past fourteen years and he didn’t want this punk kid to be the reason he gets caught.

The man carried the singer’s body for what seemed like miles before he finally arrived at the outskirts of town at a little black cottage that he knew all too well. He dropped Andy’s lifeless body on the ground and smiled at the sight of him bleeding out all over the brown grass.

He heard a door slam shut and looked up to see a tall, slender, teenage girl with black ballet shoes in hand and long blonde hair tied up in a messy ponytail waltz out the back door and across the back deck to enter the cemetery.

He had to get out of here. Dead or not, the kid had to stay and hopefully he hadn’t seen anything that he could get the man into even more trouble for. He couldn’t let the girl see him. She would recognize his face and he couldn’t risk her seeing him. He debated on staying to kill her as well, but he had nothing to use but his hands and he wasn’t the type to choke people to death. He liked to watch them bleed all the way out. He knew this house, and he would return as soon as he had a plan. The girl would be next.


	6. Saviour

Andy took in a deep breath through his nose and opened his eyes, stretching his arms up over his head. That was the craziest dream he had ever had. But then he looked around and noticed he wasn’t in his bunk on the bus. He was lying on a navy blue couch in a very dark room. The entire room looked like it had been set on fire and scorched a deep charcoal color.

He heard footsteps coming from the other room and closed his eyes again. Maybe if whoever it was thought he was dead, they would leave him out on the street somewhere and he could go find help.

He felt a very cold hand brush against his forehead and draw back some of the hair that had fallen into his face.

“Andy…” A girl’s gentle voice cooed to him.

This was all so strange. Maybe he really was dead. The girl’s hand was cold and she had the voice of an angel. But the room he was in was dark. He couldn’t be dead, he couldn’t. Maybe the girl talking to him was dead, but he wasn’t? All these thoughts raced through his mind.

“Andy…” The girl called to him again.

He turned his pounding head in the direction of the soft voice and slowly opened his eyes. He saw a girl kneeling in front of him; her face looked so familiar. He wracked his brain, trying to figure out where he had seen her before.

She smiled at him. “You’re awake. You’re not dead.” There was a hint of relief in her voice.

“What happened?” He asked groggily.

The girl’s smile turned into a frown. “I don’t know…” She trailed off. “I found you in the cemetery and—”

“Cemetery? Am I dead?!” Andy exclaimed.

“No, no!” The girl patted his shoulder to calm him down. “No, I—Well… This is hard to explain. But, I found you lying in the cemetery behind the house and you were bleeding. If I hadn’t found you, you would have died…” She trailed off again.

“You saved me?” He asked.

“Well, yeah.” The girl admitted. “I couldn’t leave you there to die.”

Andy nodded, but quickly regretted it. His whole head began to pound again. He reached up with both hands and cradled his aching head.

“Come with me.” The girl said, helping him stand up and leading him up the stairs.

She led him down a long, dark hallway. The entire interior of the house appeared to be the same burnt charcoal color as the first room he had woken up in.

She brought him into her room and let him lay down on her bed. She covered his shivering body with her black comforter and sat down beside him.

“You’re going to have to stay here for a while.” The girl informed him.

Andy slumped his shoulders and sighed. “Really? But I— I have something really important to do.” He said.

The girl giggled at his attempt to hide his identity from her. “I know who you are, Andy. I know you have shows to do, but I can’t let you go yet. You’re still in too bad of a condition to perform and the person who tried to kill you is still out there. I just…I can’t let you… I need to protect you. I’m not going to lose another person I care about.”

Andy looked down at his lap. “What do you mean you don’t want to lose another person you care about?”

The girl stayed silent and just sat there, staring at the floor. “That’s a story for another time.” She told him.

Andy nodded, respecting her decision to keep this particular memory to herself. But that didn’t mean he wasn’t going to try and find out sooner or later. He could see it in her eyes. This girl had gone through a lot of pain in her life and she was still so young. She had saved his life. Now it was time for him to save hers.


	7. Gone.

Carolyn smiled at him. “You should get some sleep. It might make you feel better.”

“No!” Andy shouted involuntarily. “I mean… No, it’s okay. I’m fine.” He didn’t want to close his eyes and sleep. He didn’t want to remove his gaze from the angelic girl sitting next to him. He had to know more about her. She was so unlike every other girl he had met.

She giggled again. How he loved her giggle. “Okay, okay. Sorry I suggested it.”

Andy looked down, embarrassed with his sudden outburst. “What’s your name?” He asked, starting his attempt to get to know her. He wanted her to feel comfortable with him. He wanted her to trust him. And most of all, he wanted to know what she had meant earlier about losing someone close to her.

“Carolyn.” She replied, matter-of-factly.

Andy nodded. “Pretty.” He commented.

Carolyn gave him a huge smile. “Really? Th-Thank you.”

Carolyn wasn’t used to getting compliments. In fact, she had never received any kind of compliment from anyone else besides her father. She never accepted the compliments from her father. She knew he was pretty much entitled to say things like that. He was her father after all and he cared about her.

Andy was already beginning to live up to his reputation. He was sweet, caring, kind, and most of all, gorgeous. His crystal clear blue eyes lit up her life with just a glance. She didn’t want to let him leave. He was the only good thing in her life and she couldn’t let him escape her grasp. She was going to plan to keep him with her as long as she could. You could say it was just Carolyn being selfish. She did think about all of Andy’s other fans out there and how disappointed they would be when they found out he had disappeared. But Carolyn felt so broken inside. Whether he realized it or not, Andy was helping her slowly put back together the shattered pieces of her life.

“What were you doing in the cemetery?” Andy asked out of curiosity.

“Dancing.” Carolyn quickly shot back.

Andy furrowed his eyebrows. “Wait. What?”

Carolyn reached down and picked up black bulky things attached to silken black strands. Andy stared at them but still couldn’t figure out what they were.

“Ballet shoes.” Carolyn clarified. “I like to dance in the cemetery. Death… is comforting for me.”

It was official. Andy thought this girl was psychotic.

Carolyn caught the slight look of terror on Andy’s face and dropped her shoes on the floor with a thud before hurrying over to his side.

“Shit. I’m sorry.” She apologized. “I didn’t mean to scare you….”

Andy shook his head. “No, no… It’s okay. You’re different. I like different.” He smiled.

Carolyn let out a deep breath, relieved that he didn’t think she was a freak, too. She always had to watch what she said around people. None of them understood what it was like to be around death all the time. And she wasn’t good with socializing either. She never knew what to say to people and when she did say something, it sounded creepy like what she had just said to Andy.

“Hey, what’s this?” Andy looked next to him at the black bedside table. He picked up the only item in Carolyn’s entire room that wasn’t black or white. It was a red notebook with her name scribbled on the front.

“Put it down!” She shouted and lunged for the notebook in his hands. She swiftly retrieved it and clutched it to her chest. “Maybe… You should get some rest now.” She reached for the door handle and left Andy in the room alone, taking the notebook with her.

That notebook was filled with Carolyn’s stories, song lyrics, poems, and little journal entries that she wrote when the voices in her head took over. That notebook was Carolyn’s entire life and she never let anyone read what was inside.

*****

When the boys woke up the next morning, all four of them were completely hung over. None of them had any idea what day it was, what time it was or what city they were in now.

“Hey guys?” Ashley stumbled out of his bunk and started pulling the curtains open to wake everyone up.

He reached for the curtain on Andy’s bunk first and tore it open to reveal an empty bed. Ashley scratched his head, thinking Andy was in the bathroom or maybe he was already awake and in the kitchen.

Ashley checked the entire bus for Andy but turned up with nothing.

“Guys?” Ashley said more frantically.

Jake poked his head out of the small compartment. “What’s wrong Ashley?” He groaned.

Ashley looked to him with wide eyes. “Andy’s gone.”


	8. You're not alone

When Andy woke up again, Carolyn was still gone. He sat up and looked around the empty room, wondering where she could be. He figured it had only been a few hours since she left and maybe she just thought he was still asleep. Should he go find her? No, he decided he should just stay put. He didn’t want her scolding him again for moving and her house was strange enough as it was.

Suddenly, the door was thrown open and a flustered Carolyn rushed in, slamming the door shut behind her. Her blonde hair was pulled up in a ponytail and fluffy strands of loose hair framed her face. Her thin frame was graced with a tight fitting leotard and a short, flowing skirt draped around her waist. She threw her bag on the floor and turned toward Andy sitting in the bed. She jumped back in fright.

“Jesus…” She placed a hand against her rapid beating heart. “I forgot you were here.” She admitted.

“Oh…” Andy slumped down again into the soft pillow behind him.

“I’m glad you’re awake at least.” She gave him a weak half smile. “You’ve been sleeping for at least a day.”

Andy’s eyes went wide. “A whole day? And no one woke me up?”

Carolyn shrugged. “I thought you were just tired…” She sat down on the end of the bed and unlaced her black Vans, slipping them off her feet and tossing them against the wall across the room. She tucked her legs underneath her and looked to Andy. “You look better than you did a few days ago, at least.” She was trying to make him feel better. She could tell that he missed his band and he wanted to go home.

Andy looked up at her. “What’s your school like?”

Now that was a random question. Carolyn figured he must just be looking for a way to distract himself from thinking about his band.

She sighed. “Same as every high school I guess. There are the jocks, the preps, the popular clique, the goth kids… And then there’s me. I’m the odd one out…” She looked down at her lap letting her bangs hang down in front of her face. “I don’t have any friends… It’s all because I’m the mortician’s daughter. They think I’m weird and, well… I guess I am kind of weird but that doesn’t mean I can’t be like the rest of them.”

“I’m your friend.” Andy said.

She looked up at him, flipping her bangs out of her face. “You are?”

Andy nodded. “Of course I am. You saved my life. It’s the least I could do.”

Carolyn nodded as well and looked down again. “I just wish I was normal…”

Andy scooted a little closer to her and placed his hand over hers. “You want to know what a friend of mine said once? He said ‘normal is a setting on a washing machine. And no one wants to be that.’”

That made Carolyn laugh, “I like that.” She smiled but then her smile began to fade.

Andy could see that she was thinking about something. A memory was coming back to her.

“What are you thinking?” He asked, trying to look at her face hidden behind her blonde hair.

“Just… the people at school… And how they call me names…” She held out her pale arms for him. “For every name, there’s a scar.”

He ran his fingers over her scars gently, tracing a few of them and then holding out his own arm for her to see. Their wrists matched. He looked from his wrist, to hers, to her blue eyes pale with pain.

“You’re not alone.” He said.

She nodded solemnly. “I know…” She whispered.

A harsh breeze came through the open window and she shuddered. Although it was now nearing March, it was still cold outside.

“Come here.” Andy gestured to her, moving over to make a spot next to him on the bed.

Carolyn obediently crawled into the empty space by his side and let him wrap his arms around her. She let the warmth of his body seep into her cool skin and warm her from the inside out.

They sat there almost all night with her resting in his arms, listening to the raging breeze calm itself down and slowly put them to sleep.


	9. Like moths to a flame, we're drawn to each other

Three weeks had gone by and Andy could feel himself falling more and more for Carolyn. He didn’t understand why. It was like there was some invisible force pulling him to her. He was drawn to her like moths to a flame. He still couldn’t understand why people didn’t like her. And he still wanted to know what she was hiding from him.

Carolyn was hiding two things from Andy. She was hiding the contents of the red notebook from him and she was hiding her past from him. He wanted to know what she had meant about losing people she loved. Andy thought maybe he was overreacting a bit. She probably just meant that a lot of her family had died from various diseases, cancers or old age. But for some reason, something was telling him that wasn’t what she had meant.

Andy didn’t know it but today would be the day he discovered one of her secrets. He was going to read what was in that red notebook.

Carolyn stood on the other side of the room by the window, looking out at the cemetery and dreaming of dance. The notebook sat on the desk beside her, calling to Andy. It mocked him.

He watched Carolyn gaze out the window. The sunlight hitting her made her blonde hair glow. Her skin looked like smooth porcelain. His eyes traveled down her slim figure until they hit the floor. There was something odd about the way she was standing. She had both her feet turned out so her toes were pointing towards the walls on either side and her heels were glued together.

And then, she started to sway. Her feet moved with the rest of her body in ways he had never seen before. She rose up onto the balls of her feet, then back down. She extended her leg out slightly—her leg was as straight as a pole—and stepped down, rising up on the ball of her foot again and kicking her left leg out behind her.

“What are you doing?” Andy asked without thinking.

She stopped immediately and whipped around to face him. A slight blush began to creep up on her cheeks. “Oh… I forgot you were here again…” She seemed to forget about him being there a lot. “I was just… I was practicing my dance…” She looked ashamed.

Andy didn’t understand why she looked so upset. “I thought it was beautiful.” He gave her a half smile.

She sat down in the chair next to the desk and covered her face with her hands. “Oh, I’m so embarrassed now…” She mumbled into her palms.

Andy stood up from the bed. “Why? You’re really very good from what I saw. Maybe you can show me the whole thing sometime.”

She looked up at him standing in front of her. His eyes were filled with sympathy and care. Hers were filled with shame and regret.

“Really?” She was surprised he thought she was good. Carolyn didn’t think she was all that good. You could say she tried to be modest and not boast about her talents like the other girls. “I… I guess I could show you sometime…After I perfect it, of course.”

Andy laughed. “It doesn’t have to be perfect. The dance could have a ton of mistakes in it but I wouldn’t notice. As long as you’re the one dancing, I’ll think it’s perfect.”

She smiled at him and stood up so she could look him straight in the eyes. His eyes were beautiful. She couldn’t stop thinking about them. Every time she closed her eyes, she saw them. She wanted to swim in those bright blue pools. His eyes reminded her of the sky. Dancing wasn’t the only thing that could make her fly. Andy’s eyes made her fly.

“Carolyn!” Her father’s voice traveled up the stairs and reached her ears.

“My father is calling me…” She looked down at the floor. “I better go see what he wants…” She shuffled across the floor to the door and left Andy in the room alone with the notebook in front of him.

He glanced back at the door before looking back at the notebook in front of him and picking it up with such care. He hesitated before picking up the notebook. He was afraid it was going to burst into flames at his touch by the way Carolyn protected it so.

He flipped open the front cover and began reading the first words he saw on the page. The words scribbled in blue pen jumped out at him and sucked him into Carolyn’s mind. He flipped through the pages and got to the newest entry. It was labeled, _The boy with the baby blue eyes_. She had quite a fascination with his eyes. The shape of them, the color of them, and the way they made her feel.

He started reading:

_Andy. That’s his name. I never thought that I would ever get to know him—let alone meet him—in my lifetime. He’s already done so much for me and he doesn’t even realize it. His music saved my life and now he’s here, in my bedroom, slowly driving me to madness. His skin looks as smooth as glass and his eyes—his eyes… They make me go crazy. Every time he looks at me, I get butterflies in my stomach. No one has ever affected me in this way and I don’t know what to do. If he ever left me, I don’t know if I would be able to control myself. I would end up cutting so deep I would kill myself because I wouldn’t have those gorgeous blue eyes to save me from myself. I know… I sound stupid. I sound like I’m obsessed with him. I guess I am in a way. But I don’t want him to think I’m creepy. Everyone else already does…. Oh, who am I kidding? He’ll never like me the way I like him… He misses his band and it’s obvious. I need to let him go. I—_

“What are you _doing?!_ Put it down!” Carolyn shrieked.

Andy looked up from the page and saw her horror stricken face. He knew what he had done was wrong. Now he had ruined all chances of her thinking of him the same way ever again. She probably hated him now.

He set the notebook down on the desk, still open. “I’m sorry, I—”

She ran over and snatched up the notebook off the desk. She closed it and clutched it to her chest, sitting down on the bed.

Andy watched her just sit there staring at the floor. Now what was he supposed to do?


	10. I love you more than I can ever scream

“What part did you read?” She looked up at him with her eyes but didn’t move her head. She already knew what his answer would be and that scared her. She knew he had read her entry about him. She knew what he probably was thinking at that exact moment. But she asked anyway, with a little hope that her intuition was incorrect.

“I read your song.” He said.

Carolyn looked at him skeptically. “Which one?” She was testing him. She knew there was only one song in that notebook but she wanted to see if he was telling the truth or not. For all she knew, he could have read through the entire notebook and knew not to say what he was reading when she caught him.

“The one about someone leaving you?” He asked, unsure if that was really what the song was about.

She knew what he was talking about though. She had written that song a while ago. It pained her to think about the memory behind the song. “Yeah…That’s what it’s about…”

“It’s a good song.” Andy said. “Could you…” He trailed off. He began to think that maybe she didn’t really want anything to do with him at the moment.

“What?” She insisted.

Andy took a deep breath. “Well, I was just… going to ask if… maybe… you could… sing it for me?”

Carolyn looked at the notebook in her hands and then opened it to the song. “Okay.” She agreed.

Andy looked shocked. “Really? Are you sure?”

“Don’t make me change my mind, Andy.” She warned.

Andy slapped his hand over his mouth and sat back in the chair. He wasn’t going to let his big mouth ruin this chance for him.

Carolyn folded her legs underneath herself before taking a deep breath to begin to sing:

_I open my lungs, dear.  
I sing this song at funerals, no rush.  
These lyrics heard a thousand times, just plush.  
A baby boy you’ve held so tightly  
This pain it visits almost nightly  
Missing hotel beds  
I feel your touch._

_I will await, dear  
A patience of eternity, my crush  
A universal still, no rust  
No dust will ever grow on this frame  
A million years and I will say your name  
I love you more than I can ever scream_

“That’s all I have so far…” Carolyn stopped and closed the notebook.

“It’s…” Andy had no words to describe the music that just escaped from this girl’s lips. It was like she sang him into a trance.

“You hated it, didn’t you…” She looked down at her lap.

“No, no I—I didn’t. It’s amazing. I just… I can’t explain to you what that made me feel. You have a real talent, you know.” He stood up from the chair and made his way over to her cautiously.

She scrambled to grab the notebook and shoved it under her comforter. Andy had revealed enough secrets for one day. She moved over on the bed and allowed him to sit down next to her.

He looked into her deep blue eyes and reached up to caress her soft cheek. He heard her breath hitch in her throat as he began to move his face closer to hers.

“I love you more than I can ever scream.” He whispered to her.

Their noses bumped together and he tilted his head to the side. She could feel his warm breath linger on her lips and he moved in closer to close the gap between their lips.

But before Andy could kiss her, the door to Carolyn’s room was pushed open and standing in the door way was a very unhappy looking mortician.


	11. You're by yourself with me tonight

"Oh, uh, I'm sorry to--uh--interrupt but... Carolyn? May I see you in the hall real quick, please?" The mortician turned and left the room as quickly as he had come in.

Carolyn turned to Andy and grimaced. She had a feeling what was coming. Her father would start to get angry about her having a boy in her room by herself and then she would get in trouble, just like any normal teenager.

She rose from the bed and followed the path her father had taken out of the room. When she arrived in the hallway, her father didn't look mad or upset. He just looked a little worried. Which to Carolyn was completely understandable. Any parent would be worried if they found their daughter alone in a room with an attractive boy.

"Carolyn, I--" He began but then cut himself off.

"Are you mad, Daddy?" She asked, shrinking away from him slightly. "I'm sorry about Andy... I--"

"No, I'm not mad." The mortician said sincerely. "I'm glad that you and this boy have become good friends. What I'm worried about is the news I have just received..."

Carolyn looked confused. At least her father wasn't mad but what news could he mean? Had the police finally discovered something else about her mother's murder?

When Carolyn didn't speak, the mortician continued on. "I have to leave for a few days. Another town has requested me to fill in for their mortician. He's very ill and they can't just leave these bodies lying around. The families of the deceased are getting very antsy about their loved ones not being prepared in time for the funerals. I have to go. It's a little extra money to help get us by. You understand, right?"

Carolyn tried to process all of the information that was just thrown at her. Her father was leaving her alone with Andy. She couldn't decide whether this was a good thing or a bad thing. It would mean that the two would have time alone but her father wouldn't be there to save her if Andy tried something that she didn't like.

"Yes, I... I understand. I'll miss you." She wrapped her arms around her father in a hug and waited as she felt his arms tighten around her.

"I'll only be gone a few days." He assured her. "And you have Andy now to keep you company. If I didn't think Andy was a good boy, I wouldn't leave you two alone."

Her father had a point. He always knew how to make Carolyn feel better. Her nerves melted away at his reassuring words. Of course Andy was a good boy. She should have known better than to get flustered with worry over Andy.

"When are you leaving?" She pulled away to look at her father.

He looked down at the wood floor. "I leave tonight, dear." He sighed. " I better go pack up my things. I leave in a few hours."

Carolyn nodded. "Okay..." She gave her father one last hug before letting him go back down the stairs to pack up his belongings.

She wasn't entirely sure what the next few days would entail. Her mind was reeling with all sorts of thoughts. She still had worry sitting in the back of her mind. There was always that ten percent chance that something bad could actually happen.

"Hey, is everything okay?" Andy's voice sailed through her ears.

She looked up and saw him still sitting in the place she had left him. She hadn't even realized she walked into her room. Her thoughts were so controlling.

"We're not in trouble or anything, are we?" He continued.

Carolyn shook her head. "No, no... We're not in trouble. We're in the exact opposite of trouble, actually." She said.

"What do you mean by that?" Andy asked.

"My father is leaving tonight to go to another town for a few days. He even said he doesn't mind leaving us alone." She informed him.

"Well. That's quite a shocker. I've never heard any parent say that before." Andy stood up in front of her.

"Yeah, well... My whole family is pretty different as you're beginning to learn." She said.

Without thinking, Andy wrapped his arms around her. To his surprise, she hugged him back. "Everything will be okay." He assured her.

_You're by yourself with me tonight_


	12. You're not alone

Carolyn stood on the concrete front steps and watched as her father drove away, leaving her all alone with the old creaky house and the attractive lead singer of her favorite band. Anything could happen now as long as she let it happen. She always dreamed of what sex with him would be like but now that the opportunity had arose, she didn't think she actually wanted to go through with it; not tonight anyway.

She went back inside the house and skipped up the creaky staircase to get to her room where she had left Andy. Or so she thought she had left him there. When she walked into her room, she found it empty. Panic filled every inch of her. He had gotten away, hadn't he. Now everyone would know that he really wasn't dead and he would go back to living out his rock star life. She would go back to living her poor, pathetic life filled with loneliness.

She looked around the vacant room and almost missed a piece of white paper taped to the window. She walked over and peeled it off the window. There was a note written on it.

_Carolyn,  
Meet me in the cemetery. I know that's your favorite place to be and I have a surprise for you. I didn't want you to be somewhere you weren't comfortable and I know the cemetery makes you comfortable. And I also wouldn't mind seeing you dance now. *hint hint, wink wink*_

_Love,_

_Andy_

She giggled at the last part and folded the note, sliding it into her back pocket. She quickly grabbed her ballet shoes before taking a quick glance out at the cemetery to see if she could see Andy from her window. She pouted when she didn't see him anywhere but ran down the stairs and out the door towards the cemetery anyway.

She looked around the eerie place and struggled to see through the light fog that had begun to fall over her. It seemed the cemetery always had fog surrounding it.

"Andy?" She called out but received a crow cawing as her only response.

A pair of strong hands grabbed her waist and pulled her back. She gasped and her eyes widened at the touch.

"Gotcha." The deep voice chuckled.

She whipped around to see Andy standing in front of her. "Shit, Andy. You scared me." She whined, smacking his chest playfully.

"So where's my surprise?" She continued.

Andy shook his head. "No, no. You're dancing for me first. You've made me wait weeks now to see you dance. You have to wait a few more minutes for your surprise."

Carolyn shot him a you've-got-to-be-kidding-me look as she groaned and sat down on the grass to lace up her shoes. Andy sat next to her and watched as she took the silken black strands in her small, pale hands and wrap the ribbons around her ankles.

After she had tied up the second shoe, she stood up and went up on her toes and back down to warm up her feet a bit. Her feet would cramp up if they weren't warmed up and it was quite an annoyance. A ballet dancer's feet are one of the most important parts of her body.

Andy watched her move around effortlessly. She looked so graceful with every movement and he wondered how she managed to stay up on her toes so long and keep her legs so straight.

Carolyn made it a point not to look at Andy when she was dancing. She knew he would take her out of her trance and she would mess up. When there was no music, she would play the song in her head so she could keep up with the tempo of how the dance should be. If she looked at Andy, the music would die and she wouldn't be able to continue.

When she finally looked at him, she shrugged and said "Well, that was it so far. Our teacher hasn't added on more yet."

Andy just sat there with his mouth hanging open. Everything about her took his breathe away. Her dancing, her beauty, her.

"I-- Wow." Was all he could manage to say.

"Oh stop it." She sat down next to him and changed back into her Vans. "I really wasn't that good."

"Stop trying to be modest." He said. "You were amazing."

Carolyn shrugged. "Can I have my surprise now?"

Andy smiled and stood up, motioning for her to do the same. He led her to the middle of the cemetery where there was a huge family plot with a brass fence surrounding the graves. He pushed open the gate and led her inside, sitting her down by the massive grave standing in the middle of the family plot.

From behind one of the smaller headstones, he revealed a guitar and Carolyn gasped, putting a hand against her mouth.

Andy noticed her slight gesture and looked confused. "Is everything okay?"

Carolyn nodded but then shook her head. "I don't know... I'm sorry, Andy. It's just that.... that guitar used to belong to my mother..."

"Oh... I'm sorry... I saw it in your room and I thought it was yours..." He looked down at the ground, shamed with himself.

"No, it's okay." She tried to assure him. "You didn't know... Go ahead. Play it." She forced a smile.

Andy smiled in return and looked down at the guitar to start playing the intro to the song.

_Those times in life we learn to try, with one intention  
Of learning how and when we'll die, but we can't listen  
I wish to God I'd known that I, I didn't stand a chance  
Of looking back and knowing why, a pain of circumstance_

_You're not alone  
We'll brave this storm_

_So here's my song I wrote in time when it was needed  
Through pain of heart or loss of mind, your burdens lifted  
You aren't alone just know that I, can't save our hearts tonight_

He strummed and sang the chorus three more times before finishing it off and looking up at her. This time, she was the one who had no words to speak.

"Did you like it?" Hope dripping off his tone of voice.

"What did you name the song?" She answered with another question.

Andy smiled and looked down at the ground. "Carolyn..."

"You named the song after me?" She said, her voice full of sincerity.

He looked back up at her and put the guitar down. He shifted his body closer to her and began to move his face in towards her. Finally, there was no one to interrupt them.

He heard her breath hitch in her throat again and it made him smile. "Nervous?" He asked seductively.

She hesitated. "No." She breathed.

He closed the gap between their lips. A jolt of energy coursed through his veins at the touch of her lips against his. The feeling of her body so close to him made him want her more. He wanted more of her. But he pulled away, and resisted his urge to just rip all of her clothes off.

"That was nice." She said. "I didn't want it to end."

"It doesn't have to." He said in return.

She knew what he meant but tonight wasn't going to be the night. She shook her head. "No, I... I can't. Not tonight anyway..."

Andy nodded, respecting her decision. "We have the next few days to ourselves," He pointed out. "There's always tomorrow." He said, hopeful.

Carolyn rolled her eyes at him. "Someone's horny." She giggled.

"Hey, I'm a guy." He said in defense. "What can I say?"

Carolyn just rolled her eyes at him again but didn't say anything. There was something stuck in the back of Andy's mind and he decided now was the time to confront her about it. "Why did you freak out when I pulled out the guitar? I mean, I know it was your mother's but... What happened to her?"

Carolyn looked up at him and sighed. "It's a long story... And... I don't know if I'm ready to talk about it."

Andy was getting more and more frustrated with each passing second. "It's okay. You can tell me." He assured her. "And we're here in the cemetery. You're safe in here. Please, Carolyn. I just want to know. Maybe I can help you."

Carolyn shifted her sitting position and looked down at the ground. "My mother..." She began. "My mother... was murdered."


	13. A senior's biggest nightmare

Andy sat there and listened to her story. He was amazed at what sort of stuff she had been through. She had been through so much more in a few years than he had in his entire life.

"So you still don't know who killed your mom?" He moved himself closer to her, hoping that his presence was comforting for her.

Carolyn shook her head. "No... But I'm going to find him one of these days. I'm not going to let him get away with what he did to me and my family."

Andy didn't really know what to say next. He had never been in such a position before and he certainly couldn't relate. He had lost his grandfather but that was because of natural causes, not murder. So Andy did the only thing he could think of. He put his arms around her and let her snuggle into his side.

When she pulled away from him to look at his face, she smiled. "Thank you, Andy. I really appreciate you being there for me."

Andy smiled in return. "It's the least I could do." He said.

"Do you..." Carolyn began but trailed off. She wasn't sure if she should ask her question or not. She wasn't sure what he would say and she didn't want to be embarrassed if his answer wasn't what she was expecting.

"No, go ahead." He encouraged. "You can ask me anything."

"Um..." She looked down at her hands. "Do you... Do you..." She was having a hard time finding the words to say what she wanted to say. "Do you want to sleep with me tonight?" She finally said.

When she saw Andy's reaction, she mentally slapped herself for the way she worded it. "I mean--That's not what I meant. I meant--"

"I know what you meant." Andy chuckled. "But yes. I'd like that."

Carolyn led Andy back inside the house and up to her room. He let her get under the blankets first and then followed behind. He wrapped his arms around her protectively and let her fall asleep safely in his arms.

****

Carolyn hated to leave Andy at the house by himself but she had already missed two weeks of school because of him and the Principal was starting to get on her back about it.

"Hey, look who's back!" One of the asshole jocks shouted out as Carolyn walked by them. "Try and kill yourself, you little bitch?"

Carolyn just kept walking by and ignored them. When she arrived at her locker, a group of girls stood by at the locker next to hers. They payed no attention to her for the most part but their conversation sparked Carolyn's interest.

"Aren't you girls soooo excited for prom?" The blonde girl, Katey, said to her friends Morgan and Kristen.

"Oh my god, yes!" Morgan exclaimed. "I really hope Brad asks me..."

"We should all take a limo! That would be so fun!" Kristen suggested.

"Yes, oh my god, can we?" Katey agreed. "And we need to go dress shopping this weekend. Prom is just a few weeks away!"

Morgan slammed her locker shut and the three girls walked away, still fantasizing about how great prom was going to be.

Carolyn returned her attention back to the inside of her cluttered locker. She grabbed her English book out of her bag and exchanged it for her math book. Just as she was about to slam her locker shut and walk in the opposite direction, Amber stopped at her locker on the other side of Carolyn's.

Carolyn snuck a glance over at Amber and saw she was just rummaging through her own locker, looking for her books, too. They had math together next.

Amber glanced over at Carolyn and Carolyn looked away. There was a lot of awkward tension between the two. Amber pretended to be nice to Carolyn sometimes but Carolyn knew that their friendship would never be the same as it used to be.

"Hey Carolyn." Amber said, to Carolyn's surprise.

"Oh, hey." Carolyn said, acting like she hadn't even seen Amber standing there.

"We have math now." Amber said. "Do you want to walk there together?"

Carolyn was shocked. She never thought Amber would ask her to walk to math with her in a million years. She had convinced herself that Amber hated her.

"Oh, uh, yeah. Sure." Carolyn slammed her locker shut and started walking down the hallway beside Amber.

"So are you going to prom?" Amber asked, attempting to make small talk on their awkward walk to class.

"Oh... I don't know... Probably not..." Carolyn said, looking down at the white floor tiles.

"Why not?" Amber asked, looking over at Carolyn.

"Well... It's just that I don't have anyone to go with. No one is going to ask me and I have no friends to go with either... No one here likes me..." Carolyn admitted. She was actually a little surprised with herself for opening up to Amber so much already.

It was silent for a moment. The only sound was Carolyn's sneakers scuffing the floor. Amber searched for something to say.

"Well... Why don't you go with me?" She suggested.

"Are you... Are you serious? You would let me tag along?" Carolyn looked up at Amber. Hope, surprise, shock, and joy filled her body.

"Sure, I don't see why not. And maybe we can get you a date." Amber said, giving Carolyn a wink and a slight nudge.

Carolyn giggled. "Thanks Amber. That's really nice of you."

The two girls entered the classroom and went to their respective seats. Carolyn couldn't remember a better day at school before.

\--

Later on that day, Carolyn stopped by the bathroom just to check her makeup and make sure her thick eyeliner wasn't smudging too much. Amber's other friends, a few of the girls Carolyn knew from dance, walked in and stood behind her at the mirror. It was the infamous Kali and her sidekick Jennifer.

"We heard about how Amber asked you to go with us to prom." Kali said.

"Yeah, we heard about that." Jennifer repeated.

Carolyn rolled her eyes at Jennifer's stupidity. "Yeah, she was being nice. Unlike you two pricks."

Kali gasped at Carolyn's choice of words. "Well, you're not going!" Kali shouted in her high pitched, nasally voice.

"Then I'm not going to prom..." Carolyn mumbled.

"What was that?" Jennifer asked.

"I'm not going to prom..." Carolyn said, a bit louder.

"Why not?" Kali asked with a hint of evil in her voice.

Carolyn didn't respond. She didn't need Kali to ridicule her for admitting she wasn't going to get a date.

"No one is going to ask you? Is that it?" Kali took a wild stab in the dark and guessed it right.

Carolyn nodded slightly. "Yeah, Kali. Okay? I'm not going to get a date and I have no friends to go with. So go ahead. Make fun of me some more."

Kali examined her freshly manicured nails. "Hmm, I don't think so. You've been through enough for today. We wouldn't want you to cut so much that you kill yourself... yet. We still need someone to... entertain us for the rest of the year." She flipped her bottle blonde hair over her shoulder and strutted out of the bathroom with Jennifer trailing behind.

Carolyn had to hold herself back from punching a hole in the mirror and shattering the glass. She gripped the edge of the sink until her knuckles turned white. This supposedly great day just went straight to hell.


	14. Fuck.

Andy heard the door downstairs slam and he smiled, knowing that meant Carolyn must be home. He listened to her heavy footsteps coming up the stairs and down the hallway. A few seconds later, the door swung open and Carolyn stormed in, throwing her bag down on the floor and slumping down in the chair across from Andy.

"Bad day at school?" He guessed.

"Damn right." Carolyn grumbled.

"So... Does this mean angry sex?" Andy asked, half joking.

"Andy." Carolyn glared at him.

"Okay... No angry sex." He replied. "Tell me what happened, then."

Carolyn sighed, standing up and walking over to the bed. She plopped herself down next to Andy and rested her head on his shoulder. "It's just..." She began. "It's just Kali. That's all."

"Kali?" Andy questioned, stroking Carolyn's silk blonde hair.

"Yeah... Queen Bitch." Carolyn explained. "My friend--ex friend--asked me if I wanted to go to prom with her and a group of her other friends since I have no one to go with. Then apparently Kali heard about it and she refuses to let me tag along which means I'm not going to prom."

"Well...Why wouldn't you be going to the prom?" Andy stopped stroking her hair to look at her.

She looked over at him, dead in the eyes and said, "Because who would ask me... I have no friends to go with and there isn't one guy at that entire school who would go with me." She looked down at her lap, folding her hands.

Andy reached over and brought his hand to her chin, tipping her head up so she could look at him. "I'll go with you." He said with a bright smile.

"You would do that?" She smiled back. "For me?"

"Of course I would. But now you have to do something for me." Andy negotiated.

Carolyn's eyes flickered from Andy's eyes to his lips and then back to his eyes. "And what exactly would that be?"

He didn't respond with an answer because they both knew what he wanted. Instead, he began to kiss her, slowly at first and then increasingly rougher. He could taste her on his tongue.

Carolyn leaned back into the pillows on the bed as Andy moved on top of her. He straddled her hips and placed both his hands on either side of her body. His lips moved down to her jaw line and then down to her neck.

She gripped the back of his shirt in fistfuls of fabric as he began to turn her on more and more. She didn't know what had come over her. She suddenly had this intense desire to have Andy's body right against hers. She wanted him.

He stopped kissing her just long enough to swiftly remove his shirt and unbutton his jeans. Carolyn wasn't sure what to do next. She was just going along with what Andy was doing.

"Are you okay?" He breathed in her ear.

She nodded and ran her hands down his bare chest.

"We can stop whenever you want to. If you start to get uncomfortable at any point, just tell me to stop, okay?" He informed her.

She nodded again in understanding.

His hands traveled down to her hips and traced the hem of her shirt. She knew what he wanted then so she helped him by removing her own shirt and letting his hands explore her body.

Not long after, there was now a pile of their clothes in the center of her floor and neither one of them had anything on.

At this point, Carolyn felt awkward. She was just laying there, completely exposed to him and he was hovering over her, smiling and grasping at her body.

"Babe, you're beautiful." He whispered to her.

She felt a hot blush creep up on her cheeks at his adoring words. "I--" She began but stopped herself. She wasn't sure this would be the right time to say this.

"What?" He asked, concern clear in his voice. "You're okay, right? I can stop if you need me to."

"No, no." She assured him. "I... I love you." She said.

Now she was filled with regret. She knew he probably wasn't ready to say it back. After all, she knew almost everything there was to know about him and he had just met her a few weeks ago.

He smiled as his hands glided down the contours of her slim dancer figure and gripped her hips. "I love everything I know about you."

It was close enough. She could deal with that. After all, Andy Biersack was currently naked on top of her. Take that, fangirls.

"Are you ready?" He smirked.

"For what?" She asked. Carolyn wasn't exactly a sex genius. She had no idea what Andy had meant. Sure, she had heard some of the more popular girls talk about it in the bathroom sometimes but she never understood how it all worked.

"It's okay," Andy said. "I'll take it slow."

Carolyn gasped as Andy ground his hips against hers and started to slowly thrust his hips back and forth. It was painful but somehow satisfying in a way. She couldn't explain this feeling.

She just laid there, tangling her fingers in Andy's black hair and her mouth hanging wide open. She couldn't make a sound. Sometimes a little moan would escape from her lips when Andy groaned. There was always an occasional, "Oh, fuck." from Andy as well.

Andy's body collapsed on hers as he pulled out and couldn't go any longer. He looked over at her confusion stricken face. "Everything okay?"

"Yeah, I just..." She trailed off. "That was... I don't know." She smiled at him.

"Did you like it?" He asked, hopeful.

She nodded. "Yeah, actually I kind of did."

"Good," Andy said with relief. "Because you have no idea how long I've been waiting to do that with you."

Carolyn laughed along with him. "Well, this has been quite a roller coaster day."

Andy agreed with her as he pulled the comforter up to their shoulders and cradled Carolyn in his arms.


	15. Prom

A few weeks had gone by and things began to change. Carolyn's father came home so the two of them had to be sneaky if they wanted to do things. But for the most part, they went back to just acting like friends. Carolyn wanted nothing more than to be Andy's girlfriend but she didn't want to be upfront about it. She had always been taught that the boy was supposed to make the first move and she felt awkward about confronting him and saying "Let's go out." Her biggest fear was that he wasn't going to say yes.

It was finally Carolyn's last day of high school. She had a couple finals to take, which included math, and then she could go home and spend the rest of the day with Andy and get ready for prom that night.

When Carolyn walked into math class, Amber waved her over and pointed to the seat next to her. Carolyn reluctantly went over to sit by her.

"Hey, so you're going to come over to my house tonight before prom so we can take pictures and stuff?" Amber asked, smiling.

"Yeah, of course." Carolyn said hesitantly. Her biggest fear was that Kali would be there to torment her and Andy.

As if Amber had read Carolyn's mind, she said, "Don't worry about Kali. I told her she can't come with us anymore. She's been acting like such a bitch lately and I would want you to go with us rather than her."

Carolyn smiled and nodded. "Wow, um, thanks Amber."

Amber just shrugged. "Hey, it's the least I could do for my best friend, right? Oh, do you still need a date? I think I may have found someone for you."

"No, actually, I found someone who said he would go with me." Carolyn grinned at the thought of Andy.

"Really? That's awesome!" Amber beamed. "Okay, well I was thinking you guys should get to my house around five so we can take lots of pictures and then we'll leave in the limo. Oh my gosh, this is just so exciting!"

"Yeah, I can't believe this is all happening." Carolyn replied.

"I am passing out the exams now." Their math teacher, Mr. Kingman, announced. "Everyone needs to be quiet."

Carolyn and Amber shared one last smirk of excitement before they turned to the heavy packet of white paper with taunting black numbers on it resting on their desks.

****

"Okay, Andy. I'm ready!" Carolyn said when she had finally got her dress on.

Andy was waiting at the bottom of the stairs in his tuxedo that Carolyn's father had lent to him. All of the adrenaline running through his veins was overwhelming. He just wanted to see how beautiful Carolyn looked in her dress.

Carolyn turned the corner and began descending blackened staircase. Her dress was a silky dark green color and traveled all the way to the floor. It had jewels caressing the neckline which took a semi-dramatic drop in the shape of a V. Her mother's pearl necklace graced her neck and her hair was all done up in loose, loopy curls.

Andy and her father stood at the foot of the stairs with their mouths dropped open. Andy couldn't believe Carolyn could look any more beautiful than she normally did. Her father was shocked at how grown up his little girl looked.

"Alright, I just gotta take one picture and then you guys can head off to Amber's house." Her father said, grabbing the camera in his shaky hands.

Andy took Carolyn's waist from behind and posed with her as her father tried to snap pictures.

\--

When they arrived at Amber's house, there were a ton of cars in the driveway. Carolyn was surprised at how many people Amber was having over.

"Hey, you're here!" Amber shuffled over towards Carolyn, wrapping her friend in a hug. "And who might this be?" She gestured toward Andy.

Carolyn looked back at Andy and smiled. "This is my date," She looked back over at Amber. "This is Andy."

Amber leaned in closer to Carolyn and whispered, "Andy Biersack of Black Veil Brides?!"

Carolyn was a little shocked that Amber knew that. "Wait, how--"

"It's my secret guilty pleasure." Amber admitted. "I don't really like all that pop music nowadays. I only pretend to like it because my friends do. They'd shun me if they found out I liked post hardcore."

 _You mean like you all shunned me?_ Carolyn thought but decided not to say anything. She didn't want to ruin the night.

"How did you manage to get him as a prom date anyway?" Amber continued.

"It's a long story." Carolyn sighed.

"Well, we'll have to have one of our old famous sleepovers again and you can tell me all about it." Amber gave Carolyn's arm a little shove and took her by the hand, leading her and Andy out to the back yard where everyone else was.

So far, prom night was beginning to look amazing. Not only was Amber Carolyn's friend again, but Carolyn had Andy with her as well. Nothing was going to be able to bring this night down.


	16. The best things in life come with a price

I believe that we all fall down sometimes but tonight wasn't Carolyn's night to fall. She was determined to make this night perfect, no matter what she had to do. If it meant giving Kali a nice punch to the gut, she would do it.

Speak of the devil, Kali arrived shortly after Carolyn, Andy, Amber and all her friends did. It seemed all Kali really cared about was making Carolyn's prom night the worst night of her life. She was out for blood.

"Carolyn!" Kali's classic nasally voice pierced her ear drums.

Carolyn groaned and rolled her eyes. "Not Kali..." She mumbled just loud enough for Andy to hear.

"Hey, girl!" Kali smiled widely and Carolyn could see that glint of synyster drive.

"Hi..." Carolyn mumbled.

"Who's your date? I'm surprised you even managed to get someone. How much is she paying you?" Kali looked to Andy who stood there, dumbfounded at Kali's attitude.

"I'm not paying him." Carolyn stated firmly.

"Yeah," Kali agreed. "He's too big of a faggot to need to be paid. I bet he was just as desperate for someone to go with as you were."

"Hold up. I got this." Andy nudged Carolyn out of the way stepped up to face down Kali. "Listen bitch," He began. "You are literally too stupid to insult. First of all, I'm not a faggot. Do you even know who I am?"

Kali shook her head nervously.

"Oh, you don't?" Andy continued. "I've done more for thousands of kids all over the world in one day than you have in your entire life. While I'm up on the stage being worshiped by thousands, you're down here being a nobody." He used his hands to show their positions relative to each other. "There's a life beyond high school. You can't live the rest of your life being an ignorant slut and a stupid cunt. Okay? So I suggest you open your eyes, bitch. Come down from your thrown. You're not little miss perfect and not everyone will always like you. When you graduate, you're going to be eaten alive by some of the people that are out there in the real world. As for Carolyn? Leave her the fuck alone. What has she ever done to you?"

"N-Nothing..." Kali stuttered.

"Exactly." Andy said. "She's never done anything to you. I suggest you start being nicer to her because you never know what's going to happen one day. She's going to be up on that stage with me and you'll still be down here in the dirt; still a nobody."

"O-Okay... C-Caro-o-lyn, I'm-m so-orry." Kali sputtered.

Never in her entire life did Carolyn think she would hear the words 'I'm sorry' spill from Kali's lips. She never thought the day would come when her idol, Andy Biersack, was personally helping her through a situation like this. She watched Kali shuffle away as Andy looked back at her, a huge smile plastered on his face.

"You're my hero." She smiled back and latched onto his arm.

The rest of the night was pretty close to perfect. Kali didn't bother her, in fact, no one bothered her at all. She was able to have fun and enjoy her night with Andy.

All good things must come to an end, but not in the way we expect. Carolyn certainly wasn't prepared at all for what was about to come next. They say what goes up must come down. The higher the object goes, the harder it falls. And Carolyn was about to hit the ground, hard.


	17. We found you

Months had already gone by and Andy still hadn't turned up. A couple of the guys figured they should just give up. They had already cancelled their tour to spend time to search for him but things weren't looking up.

"God, where could he be?" Ashley paced back and forth.

"I hope he's not dead." Jinxx said.

"Way to stay positive, dude." Jake replied, sulking and sinking into the soft couch cushions.

It seemed CC out of all of them had been hit the hardest by Andy's disappearance. He was no longer the happy go lucky CC that he always was. He would just sit by the big bus window and watch the scenery go by in the hopes that he might spot someone who looked like Andy.

As the dead town zoomed by, CC kept his eyes sharp and ready to find anyone who had a mass of black hair that resembled Andy's.

"Wait!" He cried after a few minutes. "Stop the bus!"

The bus came to a screeching halt and the force of the speed sent Ashley stumbling forward and almost landing on Jake on the couch.

"Seriously, CC? What is it now?" Ashley whined.

"It's Andy!" He exclaimed.

The guys groaned. "CC, this is the seventh time you've said you found Andy." Jake complained. "You're probably just seeing things because you miss him."

"No, this time I'm sure of it." CC said confidently. "Come look."

The three other guys made their way over to the window and looked out at the blackened house they were parked in front of. Outside on the dead lawn, a girl with long blonde hair sat with a boy with raven black hair. The boy was playing guitar for her and she was laughing at something funny he had said. And yes, the boy very much resembled Andy.

"Are you sure that's him?" Jake whispered as if the couple outside would hear them if he spoke too loud.

"It definitely looks exactly like him." Ashley confirmed.

"Let's go!" CC shouted and ran off the bus. "ANDY!" He ran towards him screaming.

Andy immediately reacted to the sound of his voice and smiled when he saw who was running towards him. "Guys! You found me!" Andy exclaimed.

Carolyn stood up from the ground as Andy did and stood back a little. She didn't want to interrupt his little reunion moment with his band.

"I told you he wasn't dead, Jinxx!" CC cried and Jinxx laughed.

"Okay, okay. He's not dead!" Jinxx replied.

"Hey, who are you?" Ashley looked past Andy towards Carolyn standing behind him awkwardly.

"Oh, I'm Carolyn." She introduced herself to the rest of the guys. "I'm actually a huge fan of you guys. You saved my life."

"I'm glad I could save such a beautiful soul." Ashley turned on the charm immediately.

Andy shot him a glare and made it obvious he was clearing his throat to signal him to quit it. Ashley, in return, gave him the pouty eyes.

"But she's hot!" Ashley mouthed to Andy.

Andy shook his head, disapprovingly. "Mine." He mouthed back.

"Well, now that we have Andy back, we can start the tour again!" Jake said, trying to change the subject so they could get back on the road.

"Yeah!" They all agreed except Andy.

The rest of the guys began walking back to the bus while Andy stayed back with Carolyn. He looked to her with sadness in his eyes.

"Go." She said.

"But what about you?" Andy reached for her cold hands.

She gave him a weak smile. "I'll be okay. Go live your dream. Your fans need you."

"Hey, Andy, you coming?" Ashley called back to him from the steps of the bus.

"Just a second." Andy called back and looked over at Carolyn once more. He leaned in and kissed her gently one last time before turning to get on the bus and leave her for who knew how long; possibly forever.

As the bus pulled away, a lone tear rolled down Carolyn's cheek. That was the very first tear she ever cried.


	18. It's all done for you

You never realize how much someone means to you until they're gone. Carolyn never knew that until now. Sure, her mother had died when she was younger but she was too little to understand that. She didn't know what any of it meant. Now that Andy was gone, she was a complete mess.

Before that day, Carolyn had never cried. Not when she was born, not when she was a little kid, not when the kids at school called her names, not even when she cut. No longer having Andy with her, but an immense emotional burden on her. She didn't feel like doing anything or going anywhere.

Part of her didn't understand how he could just leave her so quickly like that. But then she thought she was being selfish.

"Think about all his other fans." She told herself. "They missed him for all those months just as much as you miss him now."

She knew he wasn't going to come back but that she still had hope. He would wait for him to return to her every day. She would sit at the window for hours on end, watching cars pass and pray that one of them was going to turn into her driveway an bring Andy back to her. None of them ever did.

She began to realize what that odd feeling she had never felt before was. It was love. She had finally learned to love someone. She learned to love Andy.

Unsure of what to do, her father just let her be. She was already out of school but he didn't force her to go to dance or even leave her room. He would bring food up to her every so often, give a weak smile, and leave.

"What am I supposed to do?" He would sit at his kitchen counter, looking up to the heavens and ask his dead wife. "What would you do, dear? Let her sit there in her room and cry all day and all night? I don't think that's very healthy for her. I just wish there was something I could do..."

He waited for the next few days and hoped his answer would come. He went to the nearest Hot Topic to buy things for his daughter. He thought maybe new t-shirts or a new CD might cheer her up.

He looked around and spotted a t-shirt with a familiar face on it. He recognized the boy as the one Carolyn had spent so much time with. Suddenly, everything clicked. The boy on the t-shirt was the boy Carolyn had become such good friends with. The t-shirt was a Black Veil Brides t-shirt. Black Veil Brides was Carolyn's favorite band. This was bound to cheer her up, he thought.

He brought the shirt up to the heavily tattooed guy with many piercings and neon blue hair standing behind the counter. The guy scanned the tag and glanced at the shirt before folding it up and putting it in a bag.

"That'll be 22.50" He said. As Carolyn's father rummaged through his wallet, looking for a twenty, the guy continued. "You know, they're on tour right now. They'll actually be in Lowell within the next couple weeks."

The father's head shot up and all his attention was focused on the guy in front of him. "Where can I buy tickets?" He asked immediately.

"Here, I can bring the website up now and you can pay for them right here if you want." The guy said. "I'll can put your address in and have them sent to your house."

"You, son, are a miracle." The father replied. He looked up at the ceiling and smiled. This was his wife giving him that answer he had been waiting for.


	19. The concert

"I cannot believe this!" Amber squealed.

Of course, Carolyn's dad had gotten her two tickets in case she had a friend that wanted to tag along. And also because he was worried about her going off alone in the city. If she hadn't had Amber come along, he would have gone with her just to be safe.

"I know," Carolyn agreed. "I can't wait to see Andy again."

"I can't wait to see the whole band!" Amber exclaimed. "I've never been to a concert before. Are they nice? Oh my god, I'm going to start shaking or crying or faint or all three."

Carolyn just laughed at her friend's excitement. She can't remember a time where she had ever been this happy in her whole life. She was with her best friend and she was about to go and see her true love. She wondered if Andy was going to care she was there or if he would even see her in the crowd. She wondered what he would do if he saw her and began fantasizing about him calling her up on stage and letting her sing the song he wrote for her with him. She could see it now. As they stood on the stage together, gazing into one another's eyes and singing to each other. But of course, that would never happen.

"Alright, you girls have fun." Her father said as he pulled up to the end of the already rapidly growing line.

The girls jumped out of the car, receiving strange glances from a few people in line. It was as if they had never seen someone get out of a hearse before. Oh wait...

"We have to get you to the front so Andy can see you!" Amber informed her like it was some big plan.

"As if Andy even knows who you are." Some girl behind them with neon pink hair scoffed.

"Oh, and you do? What, is he like your best friend or something? You guys talk every day?" Amber taunted.

The girl rolled her eyes. "I'm just saying, you don't want to get your hopes up that he'll notice you. Just because you're in the front row doesn't mean he's going to see you and automatically fall in love with you." She rolled her eyes again and muttered "Fangirls..." under her breath.

"We weren't asking for you input in the first place." Amber shot back. "This was a closed conversation. Next time, mind your own business, would you?"

The girl gave her and insulted look and Amber and Carolyn turned back around in the now moving line.

"Don't worry about her." Amber said to Carolyn. "She doesn't know the history between you guys. She's just judging us because we don't look like they do with their neon hair and insane piercings. She just thinks we're posers or something."

Carolyn just shrugged as the line slowly crept along the concrete sidewalk. She wasn't going to let one stupid girl's comment ruin her whole night.

As soon as the two girls passed through the door to the venue, they ran as fast as they could through the crowd to get to the front. They pushed people out of the way and almost tripped over one guy's leg on their mad dash to the barrier. The theater was filling up fast.

"We did it..." Carolyn said, breathlessly as they stood right in front of the metal barrier.

"Now all we have to do is get Andy's attention when he's on stage." Amber smiled widely.

After about twenty minutes, the lights dimmed and the crowd began to go wild, chanting "Black Veil Brides!" over and over again.

Carolyn's breath hitched in her throat when she saw Andy strut out on stage in his skin tight, leather pants.

"Hey guys! How's everyone doing tonight?" Andy's deep voice penetrated her ears.

The crowd responded with wild fits of screams and shouts. Carolyn watched as a huge smile spread across Andy's face at the crowd's reaction. At that moment, she could really tell that this was what made him happy. She didn't feel bad about letting him leave. She knew it had all been for the best.

Andy scanned the crowd, taking in as many of his fan's faces as he could. His eyes stopped roaming when they landed on a very familiar pair of deep, ocean blue ones. His heart began to pound harder in his chest as his breath stopped for just a second. He was staring into the eyes of Carolyn.

"So..." Andy began to say into the microphone again. "I want to dedicate this next song to a special someone in the audience." He looked back at Ashley, Jinxx, Jake and CC who were sharing confused glances with each other. "Mortician's Daughter." He mouthed to them.

Andy winked at Carolyn and her heart skipped a beat.

"I think he noticed you." Amber whispered to her.

"OH MY GOD." They suddenly heard a girl shouting behind them. "I'M THE SPECIAL GIRL, AREN'T I! I LOVE YOU TOO, ANDY!" The girl screamed and Carolyn couldn't help but share a laugh with Amber.

As the song began to play, Carolyn stopped laughing. She quickly realized that the song playing was the song she wrote and almost the whole time, Andy was looking right at her. It was as if he was singing to her and only her; just like back in the cemetery.

\--

As the crowd began to file out at the end of the show, someone tapped Carolyn on the shoulder and she turned to see a very large security guard with a bright yellow shirt on.

"I was told to bring you back stage." The security guard stated in his voice that was deeper than Andy's.

"O-Okay." Carolyn stuttered. "Can my friend come along? We came together. I don't want to leave her alone."

The guard looked from Carolyn to Amber and then back to Carolyn again. "Oh, I suppose." He agreed.

Amber and Carolyn exchanged an excited glance as they followed the huge man back stage.

As soon as the walked through the heavy stage doors, Carolyn was embraced by someone much taller than her.

"I thought I would never see you again." He mumbled into her blonde hair.

"I could say the same." She responded.

He let go of her and pulled back so he could take in her angel face. "How have you been?"

"Since you left?" Carolyn asked. "Not great..." She admitted.

"I'm sorry..." Andy looked down at the floor.

_When darkness is all you see, this is our sweet blasphemy--_

"Hello?" Carolyn answered her phone. She sent Andy an 'I'm sorry' glance. "Yeah, we'll be right out. I'm sorry, Dad."

"We have to go?" Amber pouted as Carolyn put her phone back in her pocket.

Carolyn nodded sullenly. "It was really nice to see you, Andy..."

She turned and walked out the stage doors with Amber into the hall where the guard was waiting to guide them back to the front of the building.

Andy stood there feeling completely defeated. He watched her walk out on him just like he had done to her.


	20. As the sun went down, you ended up on the ground

Andy sat in his bunk on the bus, thinking about how he felt. As he sat there, contemplating his feelings, he began to realize that this is how Carolyn must have felt when he left her like that. It was an awful feeling. He felt empty, hollow, and dead inside.

"I have to go to her." He stood up, grabbing his jacket and heading towards the door.

"Andy, where are you going?" Jake called after him.

"I need to go to her. I can't just leave things the way they were left off. I need to fix this." He said before he jumped off the bus and ran towards the main road. He jumped in the first taxi cab to stop for him and gave the driver Carolyn's address. If this wasn't love, he didn't know what that was.

\--

After seeing Andy again, Carolyn's mind began to become cluttered with thoughts and racing emotions. She didn't know whether to smile or cry or both. Love involved too many feelings. So, she did the only thing she knew that could get rid of all these pestering thoughts. She was going to dance.

She grabbed her ballet shoes and headed out into the cemetery. The fog today was extra heavy and the sun was beginning to set. She knew she was going to need to be quick before it got too dark. Even though she loved the cemetery, it was scary during the night.

She started to sway and immediately the thoughts and feelings began to dissipate. She already felt relieved of everything. Until a coarse hand gripped her cheeks and covered her mouth. Now all she felt was fear and extreme panic.

She tried to scream but it was no use. She tried to pry the hand from her lips but he was too strong.

"This," He began. "Is for everything you and your father have done to me. You saved that faggot, and your father took away from me the only good thing I ever had in my life."

Something sharp was thrust into her side and she cried out in pain. The man let go of her body and she fell limp to the ground, clutching her bloody side and praying for help.

"Get away from her!" A familiar voice shouted.

She tried to look up and saw her hero standing there, answering her prayers. "Andy." Was the last thing she managed to say before everything went dark.

"What did she ever do to you?" Andy asked. "Please... I love her..."

When the man heard that, his facial expression softened and he was immediately overcome with a rush of memories.

_"You can't do this to me, James. I love her and you know that."_

_"She doesn't love you back, Riley. She loves me."_

_"I thought we were friends... Friends don't just do that to each other."_

_"Well then I guess we aren't friends."_

_"You're going to regret this one day. Just wait."_

"I'm... I'm so sorry..." The man looked down at the lifeless body in front of him and then walked away. He had realized he just killed the love of his life all over again but this time in the form of her daughter.

Andy rushed over to Carolyn's side and lifted her in his arms. "No, Carolyn, wake up. Please." He begged her still, cold body. "You can't leave me again..."


	21. Eric

Carolyn was lost. She looked around the empty, white room for Andy or her father or anyone who she might know but there was no one. The room was empty.

She stood there, contemplating what to do next. Should she run? Yell for help? All she really felt like doing was crying. She was alone and scared. She could still feel a slight annoying pain in her side and all she really hoped was she wasn't dead.

"Hello." A voice from behind her startled her.

She turned to see a black haired boy around her age dressed in all white. "H-Hello." She responded. "Could you tell me where I am?"

The boy shook his head. "I can't disclose that information. But I can tell you the answer to your next question. You are indeed dead."

Just hearing the words was enough confirmation for her but she still didn't want to think it true. "I can't be dead. No, I refuse to believe it." She said.

"Oh? Well take my hand and I'll show you." He held out his hand for her.

She eyed his hand suspiciously. "What's your name?"

"Eric." He said matter-of-factly.

Carolyn nodded in acknowledgement and placed her hand in his. Immediately, there was a rush of wind and the two were standing in Carolyn's living room with Andy and her father.

"This is my house." She looked around at the familiar sight.

"But look." Eric pointed in front of them.

Andy and her father were kneeling over her lifeless body that lay resting on their couch. She could see the pain in both their eyes and knew that her father was trying to stay strong while Andy's tears stained her shirt.

"Why are we here? Why are you doing this to me?" A tear escaped down and trailed down her cheek as well.

"To prove to you that you are in fact dead. You didn't believe me. And to answer your next question, no. They cannot see you." He replied.

Carolyn shook her head. She couldn't believe this was all happening. Andy came back for her but now she couldn't go back to him.

"I want to leave. Take me back, Eric." She couldn't take her eyes off Andy's tortured, pale face.

Eric didn't answer.

"Eric?" She looked behind her to find that he was gone. "Eric? No, you can't leave me here. Eric, please! You can't leave me here on my own!" She clenched her eyes shut tight and prayed for someone to save her. She couldn't stand to be here and look at the grieving faces of her loved ones any longer.

Someone tapped on her shoulder. "Carolyn." The voice cooed.

She turned around and saw the last person she expected to be standing in front of her. "Mom?"

Her mother embraced her and more tears fell from Carolyn's blue eyes. "It's me, dear. I'm here. I always have been."

"Mom, I want to leave. I don't want to be dead anymore." Carolyn pleaded.

"Do you still feel pain in your side where he stabbed you?" She asked, looking into her daughter's pain stricken eyes.

Carolyn moved her torso and winced slightly. "Yeah, I do."

Her mother nodded. "Okay, close your eyes, honey. All you have to do is believe that you are still alive. If you believe it, it will happen."

Carolyn closed her eyes but her mother spoke again. "Oh, darling? Before you leave me, tell your father I love him very much."

Carolyn nodded and closed her eyes. She willed herself to keep living. She thought of all the good things she had to live for. She had Andy and her father. She had her whole dance career ahead of her. She could move to New York and be on Broadway. She could move to LA to be with Andy.

"Carolyn," She could hear in the distance. Someone was calling to her. "Carolyn, wake up. Please, wake up."

She could see a bright light from behind her eyelids. She could feel herself resurfacing. This was it.


	22. I'm just a phone call away

She didn't even have time to think, let alone breathe, before Andy was pulling her close to him. He wanted to feel the new warmth of her body against him instead of the cold that once inhabited it.

"You're here." He said and held her closer. "You came back to me."

"Carolyn," He father swooped down and hugged his daughter as well. "My daughter, my sweet, sweet daughter." He kissed the top of her head.

"I'm surprised you both missed me so much. I was only gone for a few minutes." She looked at them both.

"A few minutes too many." Andy commented.

Her father agreed but then became extremely serious. "Honey, do you know who did this to you?" He asked.

"I don't know his name..." Carolyn looked down. "But he said something about you, Dad."

Her father's face drained of color. He knew exactly who this was. "I'll... I'll be right back, guys. Just stay here, whatever you do."

He father stood up from the couch and went outside to the cemetery where he had found Carolyn's body with Andy.

"Riley? I know you're still out there somewhere. Just... Come out and talk to me like normal adults." He demanded.

There was a rustling in the bushes as the killer from before, Riley, emerged into the bright light of the moon.

James, Carolyn's father, shook his head at Riley standing there before him. "First my wife, Riley, and now my daughter and her little boyfriend?"

"I killed Emily to make you suffer for everything you did to me. When I saw your daughter and how much she resembled her, I couldn't help it. I just got so angry and I had to get rid of her. It killed me to see how much she looked like Emily and I didn't want any trace of Emily anywhere." Riley explained. By this time, he started choking on tears. "I loved her, James."

James just watched Riley weep on his knees in front of him and beg for forgiveness. It hadn't been as satisfying as he thought it would have been.

"Stand up, Riley. I can't bear to see you like this anymore." James said.

"Call the police." Riley replied. "I'm done. I surrender. I see how much pain and damage I have done to you. I'm turning myself in. Just... let it all end."

James dialed the number and placed the phone to his ear. "Yes, I have caught the man of the deadly murder that occurred about fifteen years ago. He's in my backyard."

\--

There were flashing police lights and sirens everywhere. A couple of police men burst through the front door and stormed out to the cemetery where the killer was waiting to be taken away for good.

Andy and Carolyn remained on the couch the whole time. Andy just wanted to be with Carolyn for as long as possible before he had to leave again.

"As soon as the police leave, I'm going to have to go as well. The guys are going to be wondering where I am..." Andy said solemnly. He hated to have to leave her again but it was just the way things were going to be.

"What's going to happen to us?" Carolyn asked. It was a good question. Andy wasn't going to stop touring for a while, and Carolyn didn't want to be a bother to Andy while he was on tour, either.

"I'll be just a phone call away if you ever need me. And I promise I will come back to you soon. I'll visit every time we're in town for a show and I'll make sure I come visit when we're not touring." Andy said. The last thing he wanted was for her to be sad again.

She nodded and agreed. They couldn't be physically with each other but they both knew there was a special place in each of their hearts for each other.


End file.
